1 in 4 teens has an STD

[Swimmy]

I haven't searched for a link to the article, but that's an abysmal statistic! The teens claim that "adult experts" aren't preparing them for the realities of sex.

Regardless whether teens should be having sex at their age, in this sex-filled society, it's inevitable that many teens will have sex. Proper education needs to be provided for them. I have to laugh because Family Guy did an episode on teen sex. It was funny, true, and sad what their message was about.

We need to start educating kids on the things we think they should be kept in the dark on. They're only going to remain curious and then do something stupid, like have unsafe sex.

[rrogers40]

But no- we can't teach those poor kids about sex. Sex ed, and info about contraception, causes kids to have sex and... sorry I can't go on like that any more.

This is nothing knew when will people learn- and how can they continue to ignore it? Even if you have sex before marry chances are the person you marry will have.

[froggy]

exactly roger. what's better, to not teach them about safe sex and see those statistics or teach them so they can be prepared when they want to? Frustrates my wife to no end. And of course, the other side still clings to the "abstinence" card, like its really working. Must have picked up chlamydia from a toilet seat?

[pepe01eddie]

Stats came from the CDC - I was made aware of it only yesterday when I stopped into the ID Clinic of St. E's where I'm on the Customer/Client/Patient Advisory Board - makes me cringe, I have two VERY active sons out there - my battle cry?
WRAP THAT RASCAL!!
I love those boys - they keep me young OR that much closer to the "dirt nap" I'm a willow, I can bend!

[rrogers40]

At least with boys you only have to worry about one

[dgriffin]

Chicago Trib, this morning:

www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/sns-ap-teen-stds,0,7816348.story

"Those numbers are certainly alarming," said sex education expert Nora Gelperin, who works with a teen-written Web site called sexetc.org. She said they reflect "the sad state of sex education in our country."

Hmmm. True learning requires someone who wants to hear it.

[thelma]

My two older GDs took a Sex Education class when they were attending Middle School - 8th Grade. Parents had to sign a permission slip to allow their sons and daughters to attend.

You would be surprised the number of parents that were totally against allowing their children to attend this class!!!!!!!

I was amazed at what my GDs were taught about all the various diseases there were - I even learned a few things myself!!!!!

IMO - as soon as your teenager gets a girlfriend or boyfriend, the next day you take your daughter for Birth Control and talk to your son about having to either marry what he took to bed or pay child support for the next 21 years.

When my two boys became sexually involved with girls, I sat them down and explained to them that if the girl was good enough to be taken to bed by them, if she got pregnant - she would also be good enough to marry!!!!!!! Under no circumstances would I allow them to walk away and dump the entire matter on the girl if she got pregnant.

Either they listened to me - or they were very, very careful as this type of "accident" never occurred with either one of them.

[froggy]

thelma said:

You would be surprised the number of parents that were totally against allowing their children to attend this class!!!!!!!

I was amazed at what my GDs were taught about all the various diseases there were - I even learned a few things myself!!!!!

Honestly, thelma, I'm not suprised at all over a high number of parents against it. I'm actually appauled (sic?) by it. We can teach kids how to dress in the winter to protect them. We can teach kids how to drive to keep them safe. They require people take a gun safety course in order to get a pistol permit. But yet, its optional to teach them how to protect themselves because its sex we're talking about? Makes a lot of sense, doesn't it. But yet somehow some people justify not allowing their kids to get this education as if they'll never have sex.

And just the point thelma made about learning something you didn't know reinforces why it should be taught by someone who knows what they are talking about. Some parents think they know it all, and it would be neglectful to their kids only to find out what they knew was wrong.

And, of course, you get the other side of the arguement. "Well if we teach them, they will go out and have teen sex, and we don't want that", as if teenage pregnancy is any better an option, or, gulp, do I say abortion? Then there's the "but if they learn that stuff, its like encouraging them or telling them its ok to have sex". No, its teaching them how to protect themselves when they feel its the right time in their lives to make that decision. too many confuse teaching something with encouraging it. We teach about slavery in history class, does that in turn encourage our students to go buy slaves?

Its a fact of life, sex happens. Sometimes earlier than we'd like our kids to do so. Why on earth wouldn't you give them what they need to protect themselves? Parents need to wake up.

And I don't mean "you" as in you thelma, just in general.

[Swimmy]

But it's the lack of education that causes this. By educating them, you're not promoting deviant sexual behavior, as most who oppose sex ed believe. You're simply educating them to make intelligent decisions that effect their lives.
part I
part II
It's not the actual family guy, but the anime is dubbed over with the actual family guy episode. Holds some validity.

[Swimmy]

Forggy, I couldn't agree more!

[thelma]

I think some parents make the mistake in not discussing the PURPOSE of sex with their teenager. Rather than just tell them NOT to have sex (which will make them more determined to defy you and go out and have sex!), I have found that explaining what sex is all about is a better option, and the disadvantages of having sex with the wrong person.

What worked for me (so far) is to explain that sex is meant as an expression of your love for the person you want to spend the rest of your life with and it carries a big responsibility. This means you have to ask yourself if that person will be there for you to help raise the child that might be created from the sex act.

My oldest GD took my advice and in her words "I'm not having sex until I'm standing in front of the Minister in Church and I hear him say the words "I do"........." Let's hope she continues to believe these words...........

Peer pressure is another reason why our teenagers are having sex before they are emotionally mature enough to handle the feelings they are left with. My GD is only 17 years old and practically all her friends have had sex with someone and are constantly kidding her about still being a virgin.

[Swimmy]

Just tell her to keep her legs crossed, no matter who pressures her or how much she is pressured. If the boy is really worth it, he won't pressure her at all and will be willing to wait until she is ready.

[thelma]

Good advice, swimmy. Problem is NONE of the boys she has been interested in meet my standards of what she should be seeing!!!!!!

So far, IMO she has picked the "losers" of this world. How much longer I can "control" her is just a matter of time before she rebels. Maybe - just maybe, getting her heart broken and shedding some tears is what it will take to realize "Listen to Nana; she knows more than you do"!!!!!

And here I thought my days of watching over a teenage girl were over with - LOL

[rrogers40]

I don't want to completely come down on the absence only people because there is just as much of the non absence only programs out there. I think the entire system probably needs overhauled.

[froggy]

rrogers40 said:

I don't want to completely come down on the absence only people because there is just as much of the non absence only programs out there. I think the entire system probably needs overhauled.

The problem with the abstinence only is that they don't take into consideration that not everyone will abstain, so those who don't are left at risk for they have not been given the knowledge to make informed decisions. What I don't have a problem with, and is a good compromise, is a comprehensive sex ed program that not only teaches (not preaches) but also encourages abstinence. Something like "we'd want you to wait to do this till your older, but in case you do...." Those who are on the side of sex ed probably already do that, and have no problem with that. Its the abstinence only policy that leaves many at risk.

Peer pressure was mentioned, and is a very powerful influence, thelma. Also, thelma, you have kids and grand kids. What happens when you kept telling them not to do something? The more they wanted to do it. There is this desire to find out for themselves. Like my stepdaughter. I don't like her boyfriend because he has that snaky, shady look in his eye. My wife knows my feelings on this and she feels he is not good for her. However, if she were to try to keep them apart, the more she will try to see him. A forbidden love, like Romeo and Juliet. So, in effect, by preaching abstinence only, you will get the kids who are going to go against it.