Never cut a toe nail while sitting in a rocking chair

[Atticus Pizzaballa]

Last night I tried to cut a toenail on right large toe but not only nailed the nail but cut off a slice of skin. Did that thing bleed. I tried for 30 minutes to stop bleeding and couldn't so I called 911 who arrived 20 minutes later and saved the day. The EMS guy said I didn't need go to hospital since not deep enough to need a stitch but he finally got the toe to stop bleeding and bandaged my toe up so compression would be against the wound. It worked and bleeding stopped. 

Lesson learned: next time I sit in a chair! 

[clarencebunsen]

That sounds like the title of a C-W song. However, I don't think it will sell as a script for Chicago Fire.