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Post by mamastirls25 on Feb 13, 2009 16:56:09 GMT -5
I have WONDERFUL NEWS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I can shout it from the tree tops lol I enrolled both ethan and Dalton in service coordination with The ARC and i got a lawyer and an advocate for him through the ARC, they are going to fight for ethan , i shitcanned CNYDSO lol never felt better to do Furthermore they can go to summer camp and aquatic therapy and best of all dalton can go to preschool also Im so excited this means a break for me and a wonderful opportunity for the boys
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Post by concerned on Feb 13, 2009 17:56:37 GMT -5
I don't get it. How could all that take place in one days conversation in this message board. I was about to tell you to use swimmey's advise but I guess it was already solved.
'i shitcanned CNYDSO lol never felt better to do' :be careful about that it may come back to bite you
I was going to say that the IQ test and your other diagnostic test can suggest abnormal function in term of cognitive development and learning methods. Some kids just need alternative learning methodology. I once taught a student who was hign function autistic and wanted to learn Biology Regents. He knew me basically because when he was in a study hall next door from my Bio classroom he always wanted to come in and look and interact with some of the animals I maintained( bought and cared for with my own money;school district cut funding in classrooms, but I didn't care) he was a delight to have around; he did drive me nuts sometime---that a joke. One day in May he asked if he could take " regular kids biology" I arrainged a meeting with his parents and guidance counselor and we all talked about what would be required for him to mainstream in a :regents: level course. Everyone agreed. This is the part that drives me to tears. In Sept I talked with my kids about him and with there parents concerning him. The support was instant. This kid just marveled at Biology. He scored a 86 on the Bio Regents. We were all so proud.
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Post by mamastirls25 on Feb 13, 2009 18:21:54 GMT -5
Concerned
Its called calling the right people and getting a lawyer involved people tend to move a bit faster and i was on the internet all night last night researching my options plus i was doing stuff before i came to the message board i just wanted some more opinions
I was lucky enough to find a lady that helped me immensly
and as far as CNYDSO they are under the radar right now for not providing ethan with all his services i am very upset that he could have had so much more offered to him but they never offered it but the ARC is on top of it
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Post by concerned on Feb 13, 2009 18:42:12 GMT -5
Besides they are getting more state aid money with him being disabled than a regular student /// I am suprised you would reduce it to money. ARC can help you. I hope you get what you need not what you want. Children with special needs takes a massive co ordination between all involved. Use you rights for the educational benifits of the children not for a break from the stess of taking care of them. I thought you were interested in home schooling!
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Post by bobbbiez on Feb 13, 2009 19:08:59 GMT -5
No matter what avenues you take I hope all works out to benefit your children the most. You have my congrats for fighting for your children against a system that doesn't always make the right decisions for the best of all. There have been many cases were they have failed other children in your son's situation. Keep all up and don't be afraid to buck the system who feels at times they know it all.
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Post by concerned on Feb 13, 2009 19:21:24 GMT -5
I still think something does not add up with this one. I guestion the fact that just a little prodding is needed when it comes to be potty trained. There are some mothers who still breast feed a child after the age of 4 into the age of 6.I wonder if Ethan was in pre-school, why the parents had problems with him being in school after the tooth infection what happenned to justify a educational neglect status--not being potty trained doesn't fit into the equation. Something else is going on in this whole story. I am sure ARC will get to the bottom of this because they do an extensive investigation.
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Post by mamastirls25 on Feb 13, 2009 22:30:51 GMT -5
""""I still think something does not add up with this one. I guestion the fact that just a little prodding is needed when it comes to be potty trained. There are some mothers who still breast feed a child after the age of 4 into the age of 6.I wonder if Ethan was in pre-school, why the parents had problems with him being in school after the tooth infection what happenned to justify a educational neglect status--not being potty trained doesn't fit into the equation. Something else is going on in this whole story. I am sure ARC will get to the bottom of this because they do an extensive investigation.""""""" Ummm EXCUSE ME Concerned !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Im gonna get a little pissed because quite frankly your ASSUMPTION has me to TEARS .... For one for you to assume that i think it is all about money NO !!!!!!! I was saying that since they get more money for him being disabled that you would think that they would want to do more for him ,,, Secondly He is not potty trained because he has a brain malformation that is called a Mega Cisterna Magna it can kill him it is life threatening and i choose not to think about it and i didnt want to bring this to a message board because it upsets me but you have forced me to CONCERNED !!! Furthermore this is the reason he is not potty trained he does not have the muscle tone and the reason for him not being able to go to the bathroom , Why must you act like i am a horrible parent I AM NOT ,, we got his teeth taken care of he was not in preschool and we were turned in because we had him out of school because he has Oral SUrgery 2 days before school started Instead of Assuming CONCERNED !! maybe you should ask me instead of throwing out accussations on a public message board i am a mother trying to take care of 2 special needs kids and i come here for support not to be thrown under the bus Ask warcup he can vouch i am not a neglectful parent and i am sure he would tell you so as well would Clipper God BLess you and i hope that you think about what you say before you speak again Michelle
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Post by lrtill on Feb 14, 2009 8:55:37 GMT -5
mamastirls - Since I have just recently begun working at RCIL, I don't know exactly what they might have to offer you and your boys but I know they have a ton of programs and supports for people and families with disabilities. If you haven't called them before, I suggest you call the main number and speak to someone who could direct you to any services that you might benefit from. Good luck!
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Post by mamastirls25 on Feb 14, 2009 10:20:14 GMT -5
Thank you Irtill
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Post by concerned on Feb 14, 2009 11:02:32 GMT -5
You should have mentioned Mega Cisterna Magna , that changes the entire conversation. I wish you luck in the caring of your children. I must be very stressful. I hope you find the services that you need to make your kids life more enriching. You and your husband have a tough road ahead of you. I shall pray for all of you and ask a few religious communities ask for healing for you sons.
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Post by mamastirls25 on Feb 14, 2009 11:12:57 GMT -5
Concerned Thank you for understanding.. Im sorry if i jumped ship on you yesterday but it hit a nerve .. Scott and I dont try to make it public about his brain malformation. One because people dont understand it and number 2 it bothers us to think about it . We are going to shriners in springfield to meet with a neurosurgeon there to see what his thoughts are. We know this can not be operated on as it is in a place that is inoperable. BUT we also know of children that have them that never have any problems so we are fingers crossed We sent his scans to University of Chicago and they took 2 years to come back but we got a solid answer from a team of doctors out there we would love to go there but our insurance company will not pay for an out of pocket provider and the cost would be astronimical but part of me just wants to say screw the cost and get a second opinion from the dr out there that studies this type of thing Ethan is a very special child and i never saw myself as having a special needs child now i have 2 and i cant imagine life without either of them ... People dont understand how hard it is and it is hard for a man to understand ;D but i thank you for coming back and taking the time to understand the bigger picture thank you
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Post by Clipper on Feb 14, 2009 12:23:03 GMT -5
Mamastirls, I am glad to see that lrtill has responded to you. I have know her for years, and although her field is respiratory therapy, she has spent many years in case management and home care, and is very well versed in what is available for assistance in many areas. Not to mention the fact that she is just a sweetheart of a person, LOL.
Don't be angry at Concerned. When we come to a chat forum for support and put our personal issues up for discussion, we have to expect that not ALL opinions are going to sunshine and roses. I have been on both sides of that phenomenon. I received both support and negative comments when my youngest son was addicted to drugs and was in rehab.
I also handled the situation with my former stepson poorly by stifling free and open commentary. Many of us know that he has some other issues going on in his personal life. While he and I are not close, and don't communicate since I moved here to Tennessee, I simply wanted to forestall any of that coming to light in the OD until he had been dealt with by the state police and the courts. Although he is the one who loaded his own plate off of the" buffet of problems", He does deserve to have SOME of his privacy preserved, where it doesn't concern the problem with the DWI stop.
The real truth with my issue concerning Matt, is not that I care whether OUR folks criticize of have negative comments. It is that what appears here at our forum, is read by the OD. I am positive of that fact. I did not want our members to inadvertently feed the frenzy from the hypocrites at the OD.
The point being that I panicked and handled that particular situation poorly (what's new), but when and if the facts or issues DO come to light, I will have no problem with letting the comments roll. My defense of him is aimed at protecting his family moreso than him as an individual.
Just be assured Mamastirls that you DO have a support group here, and we all sympathize with your situation. That simply doesn't mean that everyone's opinion is going to fall in line with your own. Do ya understand what I am telling you? We love ya kiddo, and I pray for you and Scott and the boys every day.
Our forum is like a buffet also. You can take what you want, and simply ignore the rest. I am sure that nobody on here means any harm, and simply is stating an opinion, and we ALL know what they say about those "opinions" LOL. So let the comments roll and take what you need and leave the rest.
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Post by Clipper on Feb 14, 2009 12:37:45 GMT -5
I Concerned must have been posting while I was typing also. I am glad that you two understand each other better now. I have a deep respect and sincere sympathy for your situation darlin. We all do. It has to be exhausting to keep on top of all the issues 24/7 and to still be cheerful for the kids. As I have said before, God never gives us more than we can handle, and if he brings ya to it, he will bring ya through it. With every "mountain you climb and conquer" you become stronger. You two are great parents and Scotts ambition and work ethic is admirable. Hang in there sweetheart. You are a symbol of strength and success to others that read of your stuggles and successes in carrying on day by day.
I have to offer a tidbit from my recovery from alcoholism. AA teaches us to live "one day at a time". That is a very important thing to remember. Tomorrow never comes, and the past should be left in the past. TODAY is the only day we have any control over. When things seem to be piling up, just remember to think of time as being only 24 hours. The day will be over when you go to bed, and with each day comes a new sunrise, and another chance to put yesterday away in the past and forget about it.
Living one day at a time, and the words of the serenity prayer, bring ME great comfort each and every day, and prayer IS answered, so keep on praying. God will give you the strength to handle your situation, day by day. Many of us pray, and you are mentioned daily in our prayers.
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Post by mamastirls25 on Feb 14, 2009 12:51:23 GMT -5
Thanks CLipper I went into momma bear mode and with my fibromyalgia in a flare WATCH OUT LOL ... My family is not being so supportive at the moment and i got news last night that my health is gonna require some new twists nothing horrible but not fun none the less I just want what is best for my kids and if someone does not see what we go thru everyday its hard for them to understand I hold no hard feelings against concerned i just wish he had asked differently and worded a bit softer
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Post by dgriffin on Feb 14, 2009 13:13:38 GMT -5
Thanks CLipper I hold no hard feelings against concerned i just wish he had asked differently and worded a bit softer There isn't anyone on this forum who wishes Michelle or her family anything but the best. We can't totally appreciate her situation. This is a forum, for God's sake, not a women's dormitory! Michelle, all we can know is what you post, what our experience adds to it ... right or wrong ... and your tone. And we can offer suggestions. To me, Michelle, you struck me as being uncooperative with the school system. I have no idea whether you are or not. My post simply tried to encourage you to try to work with them. You say you have done so and have given up, calling them names and doubting their sincerity. Such words only support my opinion, even though I am aware that you are upset. I'm a man, and I approach problems with an attitude that points most directly toward solutions, not feelings. I have nothing more to add, since I don't think I'll be helpful to you.
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